I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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