Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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