she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
