I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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