And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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