hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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