My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
