Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
