oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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