so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize