that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
