just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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