I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
