# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
