mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
vagina is talking i cant
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
