i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i think i have herpe
just one?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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