I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
