dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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