I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize