So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize