Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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