Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I want her autograph on my taint
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
