yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
