Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
There's always time for handjobs
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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