That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
too bad you live with your parents still
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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