Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
