Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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