my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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