Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
