I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
