I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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