How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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