he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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