yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
