You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
