do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize