she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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