S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
