I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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