He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
