i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize