the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize