I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
