was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize