I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
