kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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