Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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