what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Randomize
