your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
