I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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