Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Is it because I queefed?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
